Monday, January 12, 2009

My thoughts on the book "Twilight"

Well, I had high hopes for this book since it was recommended very enthusiastically by a couple of friends. Let me say that the first 300 pages or so were drivel. Very uninteresting and very poorly written. The author provides WAY too much detail about Bella's day to day activities (get up, get dressed, eat breakfast, wash dishes, drive to school blah, blah, blah) over and over again. I had absolutely NO problem putting this book down and going to bed every night for the past week and a half. For a quick read (and this is one, the type is big and spaced out easily) it sure took me a long time to plow through it. My review gets a 1 for the first 300 pages. I had no intention of reading the rest of this series at this point.

The second 2oo pages actually got interesting. The storyline, such as it was, finally picked up and there even was a bit of action thrown in. Meeting Edward's family and hearing their backstories was fun. Watching the baseball game was fun. The confrontation with the villian was exciting, albeit resolved quickly.The last 200 pages were more captivating. I read them all yesterday. So, that half of the book gets a 3 (I liked it).

The characters weren't that compelling (except maybe Alice but so far her role has been minimal) and we don't learn much about them. Edward is beautiful. That's about it. Bella has nothing else to say about him. His treatment of her would set of warning bells in any self-respecting young woman's brain, but since he's a vampire, I guess it's excusable for him to control her and stalk her. Bella is shallow (she falls madly for Edward based solely on his looks) and bereft of personality. Much of the first 300 pages of the book center around her cleaning up after, and waiting on her father. The last 200 are filled with sap about her obsession with Edward and her need for him to be with her every minute of her life. Her knight in shining armour. Bella is NOT a strong female. If my daughter, as a teen, models her own relationships with boys after Bella's, I will have failed in raising her to be an independent, free thinking, young woman with a sense of self-worth.

So... to average, 2 stars. Will I read on... probably. I think I can give New Moon a chance, anyway. My friend has already loaned me the rest of the series, so it's not going to cost me a cent. Perhaps we'll see some growth in the characters as they continue their relationship. Maybe they'll develop some hobbies. Maybe the villian will resurface. Maybe I need something else to lull me to sleep at night!

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Table Manners (Seuss inspired)

I wrote a poem. Just a little window into my life as a stay-at-home Mom (for 3.5 more months, anyway). Cory said that I should post it on my blog. I said "Why? I only have 3 readers!" But he insisted, so dear readers (all 3 of you!), here is a glimpse into my soul!

PRE-CHEWED FOOD
(or an ode to my son’s under-developed table manners)!


My name is Connor, I am two.
I like to spit out all my food.
My table manners aren’t that great.
I’ll often show you what I ate.

My food is good, my food is yummy,
I like the food, but not in my tummy.
I chew it up, then spit it out,
I like to leave the chunks about.

I do not want it on my plate.
On my plate is second-rate.
I like to leave it on the table,
Or on the floor, when I am able.

I’ll eat it later if it’s there,
I like to pick it off my chair.
Sometimes I squish it in my hair.
Sometimes I smash it everywhere!

Would you like my pre-chewed food?
Even though the food is crude.
Would you eat it off my chair?
Would you scrape it from my hair?

I would not eat it off your chair,
I will not scrape it from your hair.
I will not eat your pre-chewed food,
Pre-chewed food is really rude.

Will you eat it off the mat?
Will you pick it off the cat?

I will not eat it off the mat,
I will not pick it off cat.
I will not eat it off your chair,
Nor would I pick it from your hair.
I do not like your food pre-chewed,
Pre-chewed food is rude and crude!

Will you scrape it off the floor?
Will you scrape it off the door?

I will not scrape it off the floor,
I will not scrape it off the door.
Not off the mat or off the cat,
Not off your chair, not from your hair.
I will not eat it chewed and bit,
I draw the line at mushy spit.


Will you eat my pre-chewed food,
When you’re standing in the nude?

I will not eat it in the nude!
I will not eat your pre-chewed food!
Not off the floor or off the door,
Or your placemat, or angry cat,
Your sticky chair, your matted hair,
I do not like my food pre-chewed,
Your pre-chewed food is nasty, dude!

You will not eat it, so you say,
Try it, try it, and you may,
Maybe play with it, instead,
That’s always running through my head.

It’s fun to squish between my toes
It contributes to your mopping woes.
It sticks to the table and the walls,
It’s on the ceiling and in the halls.

Do you like my pre-chewed food?
Left with love, your little dude.
Come on Mom, it’s just for you!
My name is Connor, and I am two!